As I was walking in DC today, I saw a group of people having an argument. Looking to avoid trouble, I steered wide of them; but I couldn't help overhearing this phrase: "Look, you got a man, right?"
Verbal phrases are a little bit like fingerprints in that they reveal a little of who you are. The person asking if the lady in question if she "had a man" betrays a selfishly possessive attitude that treats others like objects or trophies, something to "have" or "possess".
It makes me a little sad.
Therefore, we should be mindful how we talk to each other, about each other, and most importantly the attitudes we hold about each other.
There's a Who there, not a What. And as the Whos say: a person's a person, no matter how small.