If You Know What I Mean

I make some of the worst jokes sometimes. They're not even funny, but they do amuse me. Most of them are language driven - some things just sound funny, even though they are not themselves funny.

It's not that they are offensive, they're just not funny -- except in my head. I know what I mean.

I went to Wegmans a couple of months ago, and the teenage girl checkout clerk was Turkish (obviously second generation). I mentioned I used to live there once and she asked if I spoke Turkish.

"Badly", was the answer. "I use it as a convenient language my kids don't understand. They think that hadi, gidelim is a girl in the Prosthetics Department." -- and she laughed!

Now, this is only slightly amusing if you're an English speaker listening to Turkish and have an overactive word association imagination. It means "Come on, let's go", but if you say it quickly and listen with an English ear, it sounds like "Heidi, get a limb".

The Greeks also have a saying: Christos Anesti! (Christ is risen!) Alithos Anesti! (He is risen indeed!).

So, in that same spirit I offer you my Easter greeting: "Halitosis is nasty!"

(If you know what I mean.)